Show your pickup lines!

I only have 5 minutes to live.. can you save my life?
Have any samoan in you? No? Want about 7 inches?
Do you sleep on your stomach? No? Can I?
Hey, do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checkin out my package!
Hey, do you have the time? Because i've got the place.
If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right was Christmas would you mind if i visted between holidays?
Is your daddy a pirate? No.. You coulda fooled me with a boooty like that!

I'm an astronaut and my next trip is to Uranus.
Are you a farmer? Well, maybe we could put your tulips and my tulips together.
Is your dad a baker? Well, you have some pretty nice buns.
Is your dad a baker? Well, he sure knows how to make cutie pies.
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you tonight?
I lost my number, can I have yours?
Lol.

teddy bear and uranus are funny.

I like the "lol' one
XD

I don't have a shovel but I dig you.
hahaha

You're like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!
Let's make like a fabric softener and 'Snuggle
I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was standing right next to me.
Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.
If I could reach out and hold a star for everytime you've made me smile, I'd hold the sky in the palm of my hand
Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
Was your dad king for a day? He must have been to make a princess like you
There must be a lightswitch on my forehead because everytime I see you, you turn me on!

baby, if you were a screen door, i'd slam you all night long.

Do you work at Subway? 'Cause you just gave me a footlong.

eaturpye wrote:Do you work at Subway? 'Cause you just gave me a footlong.

now that's good.

Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk by again.
I'm not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock!
Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven you angel.
There are 206 bones in the body. Do you want another one?
Does your dad work for Campbell's? Because your lookin' mmm....mmm....good.

Why don't you sit on my lap, and we'll see what pops up
Hey girl, wanna do some math? Lets add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply

I'm like a Rubik's cube... The more you play with me the harder I get!
My magic watch says that you don't have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast
I wish that you were my homework so i could do you on the table.
Nice shoes wana F^*%
The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word
Nice legs what time do they open

Are you a parking ticket? You got fine written all over you.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I could see myself in your pants.

You are a 9.9999. You'd be a perfect 10 if you were with me.

Have you heard of Platform 9 and 3/4? Well, I can think of something else with the exact same measurements.


If you were a Dementor, I'd become a criminal just to get your kiss.


My name may not be Luna, but I sure know how to Lovegood!


I know we're not in Professor Flitwick's class, but you still are charming.


My love for you burns like a dying phoenix.


Being without you is like being afflicted with the Cruciatus Curse.


Hagrid's not the only giant on campus, if you know what I mean.


Your name must be Severus Severus, because you're making my prince full blood.


Interested in making some magic together? My wand is at the ready.


I must have had some Felix Felicis, because I think I'm about to get lucky.


Without you I feel like I'm in Azkaban and dementors are sucking away my soul.


I've been whomping my willow thinking about you.


If I were to look into the Mirror of Erised, I'd see the two of us together.


You are like a bottle of Skele-Gro: You're growing me a bone.


You must be magical, because I've fallen under your spell.


I'm not wearing an invisibility cloak, but do you think I could still visit your restricted section tonight?


I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets.


You don't even have to say "Luminos Maxima" to turn me on!


Have you been using the Petrificus Totalus spell? Because you've made me stiff.


Whaddya say you and me go look for the Room of Requirement?

Do you want to head to the Shrieking Shack? We could do some shrieking of our own.

Are you using the Confundus charm or are you just naturally mind blowing?


Is that a wand in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

"Hey, are you planning on walking to your car alone tonight?"

"Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

Hey nice shirt, it's very becoming on you. Well, if i were on you, i'd be cumming too : )

iCookies wrote:Hey nice shirt, it's very becoming on you. Well, if i were on you, i'd be cumming too : )

wow

my brother made this up, "i aint no subway, but i can give u a footlong"

morbid9567 wrote:my brother made this up, "i aint no subway, but i can give u a footlong"

If your BROTHER made this up, then i'm assuming this thread isn't just about picking up girls.

i messed it up, its i aint no subway, but for 5$ u can get a footlong

Actually its

eaturpye wrote:Do you work at Subway? 'Cause you just gave me a footlong.

Huh what? What are we talking about?

Pickup lines? Okay. Uhh...


Here's a few I know.

I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.

I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.

If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.

If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.

guy: Fat penguin...
girl: What!?
guy: Just needed something too break the ice.

Believe it or not that has worked for me before.

if you were a sandwich at mcdonalds you'd be calld mcgorgeous

If practice makes perfect, then your momma must have been practicing a lot cause she definitely made you perfect.